Steady the Boat
I recently had the privilege of attending a virtual workshop with the renowned psychologist and Harvard faculty member, Dr. Christopher Willard. His message was simple yet profound. He said, “Mindful, compassionate, peaceful adults create mindful, compassionate, peaceful children.”
Dr. Willard talked about a life-changing experience he had while listening to peace activist and meditation teacher, Thích Nhất Hạnh, in 1999. Growing up in Vietnam, Nhất Hạnh had seen families trying to flee the war by setting out to sea in small boats. Observing the boats in the water, he noticed that if one passenger on the boat began to overreact, the whole boat began to shake, with some eventually capsizing. If one passenger remained calm, their energy and presence could steady the small boat and keep the family safe from harm.
This story’s metaphor deeply resonated with Dr. Willard’s life experience, yet in 1999, no science could explain it. Now, however, we can. Neuroscientists have proven how, essentially, our emotions are contagious. Our mirror neurons are fast at work processing what we see in our environment and producing similar energy in the way of emotions. While science demonstrates that some are more physiologically predisposed to react to people’s emotions than others, this same predisposition sets them up to be incredibly empathic. While the science is more nuanced than what I’ve described, hopefully it captures Dr. Willard’s point -- that parents are children’s emotional barometers. He encouraged parents, now more than ever, to take our own self-care seriously so we can “steady the boat” for our families.
Graland Country Day School
Graland Country Day School is a private school in Denver, Colorado, serving students in preschool, kindergarten, elementary, and middle school. Founded in Denver in 1927, Graland incorporates a rich, experiential learning approach in a traditional classroom setting, emphasizing the development of globally and socially conscious leaders who excel academically.
